My past still scares me yes its true,
something's still confuse me, wouldn't even have a clue.
This poem is to make you all understand,
so you believe me I never for one second had it planned.
I was born in late July,
for me this was all the beginning of a confusing nasty lie.
Just lied in hospital sick as can be,
no one even wanted me.
But I believe I was made for a purpose,
to fix my family way down deeper than the surface.
A whole lot of my dramatic lies to get me home,
to a childhood of being alone.
I was given deep struggles early on to scar me maybe,
but I soon was to mature, grow and learn to see.
I learnt not to trust anyone in this life pretty quick,
maybe in better words to keep my family secrets whether they were ever so sick.
After all the kinds of assault,
I learnt it was of my own fault.
I was to blame,
whenever there was any kind of shame.
I gave up on trying to supress it all inside,
I learnt that from life I could no longer hide.
I had to learn that in the world of lies which I was beginning to loose count,
that I was a small child and should never put up with that amount.
I went on to drugs and was meeting people, who had their own lives to sort,
These people betrayed me and were capable of a lot more than I thought.
On the streets was no safe place,
and after a while I learnt that was what I must face.
I was to scarred to ask for help and help myself by learning to commit,
Put my life in good hands and on the dotted lines bring myself to submit.
I was going out of control inside,
nothing left I had lost all my pride,
Now I am around people who care,
I am learning to trust and I know someone is always there.
I don't want to let myself or them down,
but I try everything and still can't wipe this stupid frown.
I really want the help and need it so much,
but I can't just say that as such.
I need to forgive and forget,
Meet with my past and leave it where we met.
I am really grateful to all the people who are helping make this all clear,
so I can go on with my life free of fear.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.I would like to translate this poem