Confidence To Pride Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

I sought many years ago,
To stop thinking of myself...
As one I should first please and pleasure.
Although this admission,
May seem a contradiction.
It isn't.
Since I continue to be convinced,
If a thinking of myself to do...
With a focus of intention meant,
I would not have spent the time I had given...
Sharing my experiences with others to forgive,
Them taking my efforts to endeavor to choose...
To do what they please to leave me,
Excusing what they've done.
While some chose to perceive of me to be,
The one leeching to seek from them opportunities.

And introducing opportunities I no longer do.
Not to leave anyone 'thinking',
I am in need of help to please and pleasure 'myself'.
If selfishness was in my vision to wish,
None of what I have done to accomplish...
Would have been possible without,
Listening to learn and overcoming obstacles...
That use to leave me with myself to doubt.
And doubts to face to erase I've replaced,
With confidence to pride regardless who decides...
I am arrogant with it unknown how it was earned.
Or what had been sacrificed to achieve it.
I would say...
I have grown to recognize conflict.
But allowing myself to become absorbed to obsess it,
Is not a choice from many others I can choose.