Delmar Loop Revelation

Rating: 5.0

He opened the apartment
door and I went in
and plunged
into an Ocean. My life
went floating by like scraps
of stuff on foam and waves,
some beautiful, some not.
The Silence roared. Don't know
how long I stayed. Back on the street,
old ladies in babuschkas and
young ones in jeans
walked back and forth
like tongues of bells
as snow came down,
the news that Peace
had been proclaimed.

Lamont Palmer 07 December 2005

Max, you're master of the short, short story, yet still maintaining a certain lyricism.

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Amberlee Carter 07 December 2005

your words took me there- what other compliment could you possibly need? Wonderful writing my friend... Always, Amberlee

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Ulrike Gerbig 08 December 2005

i like this poem: its style and its imagery! u.

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John Kay 07 December 2005

A very tight and well written poem. Is there any limit to how good you're getting?

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Linda Hepner 07 December 2005

The silence roared! Like the ocean of your head! A short story in itself.

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Raynette Eitel 07 December 2005

This is both mysterious and beautiful. Love the simile about the tongues of bells...babushkas and surreal! I loved it all. Raynette

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Ivy Christou 07 December 2005

short but still long enough to take me there and let me watch all that! splendid work Max! HBH

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