Shireen Ramadan

Rookie (14/5/2012)

Diary Nosebleed - Poem by Shireen Ramadan

Is it supposed to be ME unworthy
All what's spinning in nowhere & no cause, reasonable
Supposing 'REASONABLE'
No walking ov value
No mates ov genuine rhyming world
No preciseness, no lines nor boundaries
No stop signs on the road
His image echoing & sweet sulfur voice
Am I supposed to die now, NOW?
Am I supposed to choke, in lies ov momental everyday
Day, after day, after day moving zigzags
A phantasmagoria nightmare
Am I human for the meantime
Or just robotic fading vision
I feel the horrid empty every hour passing
I'm feeding on failures
False expectations, loathing clocks
Lost in space & time just gazing
Ticking again, again irrevocable
Cannibalised my Muse became, wrinkled
Not sitting on banks ov rivers as claimed

He promised to stay
But fled from my inside
He promised not to leave me alone
But eating his promises continuous
I curse a nosebleed sickness
I feel like mean jokes & dampness
Holding hands with death always
Hand in hand, just walking
Every day, inevitable...
Every quantum & weight & length
Every tiny particle ov my sore existence
I nosebleed their promises
I don't claim a diary on you fellow
But just inquiring about it
If you're here, just tell me:
You're listening
Is it abstractness, stupidity, lunacy structured in my frame
Is it reality inverted
Or simply Matrix
Maybe we're humans & humans we eat
Maybe we're puppets in bondage bizarre
Maybe he didn't fancy even, evenness
Or simply LIED
I don't take that
Nor my diary nosebleed for granted.....

Poet's Notes about The Poem

dedicated to Sameh, my boyfriend

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Poem Submitted: Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Poem Edited: Wednesday, July 25, 2012

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