Direction Poem by Smoky Hoss
Direction
The painters
The writers
The music makers
All the artists
Of the world
In their own dialect
Speak the language
Of life
With a sense of
Awe and fear
Of living and dying.
Yet always trying
To reach the pinnacle,
Trying to show
The way,
Trying for fulfillment and sanctification.
They all in one way or another
Navigate
By the needle of trust
In the compass of hope
Pointing due Homeward.
Smoky, I like that metaphor of the compass at the conclusion. Up to that point, you're using too many abstractions (awe, wonder, defeat, etc) , telling the reader instead of showing through vivid images. You might immerse yourself in good contemporary poetry (Billy Collins, Mary Oliver) for guidance and inspiration. If you have time, check out my new website: jeffersoncarterverse.com Tell me how you like it. Yrs, JC
Thanks Jefferson. I sincerely appreciate your advice, and the fact that you took time to read something of mine. I am uneducated and quite a simple person, so your thoughts on how I may improve my writing shall be taken to heart. Again, thank you very much.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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5/3/2024 9:25:45 PM # 1.0.0.1119
So very true Smoky, and hopefully, all find their way. Thanks for sharing.