Finest Place In The Sky Poem by Stephen Gradwell

Welcome my friends, welcome and hi,
You've finally discovered it,
Finest place in the sky.

5 star accommodation, fully guaranteed,
Not good enough for you? moan as you please,
Everything is a little cheaper than you used to,
But hey, doesn't that give you something to talk about?

And on our huge big and beautiful screens,
The finest repeats of all those wars, your so used to,
You can watch them with General Douglas McCarthy,
He's got so many more friends here than Gandhi.

And don't dumb down your racist humour,
Just because your a house guest,
We still segregate everyone and everything,
Just how you like it.

And just for added fun,
We split everyone up,
So you can find love and break hearts once again,
And yes, people still care if you have sex with men.

By added request slaves are legal here,
And you get drunk with one can of beer,
And paedophiles get their own special room,
And foreign kids with no need to groom.

And we've made war all that more exciting,
But its safer now so kids can join in,
Its heaven on earth for you I guarantee,
Pleases everyone but gracious me.