Fried Chicken, Made Of Awesome Poem by David Welch

I think it is time that I take a stance
on an issue of supreme importance,
I've stayed quiet on it for far too long,
to keep living a lie feels so wrong,
I hope this doesn't sound hokey or trite,
I expect much flak from the left and right,
but it's clear that when all is said and done,
friend chicken is truly made of awesome.

There! It's said! Let controversy begin,
but I'll repeat it, again and again!
Fried chicken is God made into a food,
don't care if that sounds blasphemous or rude,
the crunch that proceeds mouth-watering bites
is enough to set a bad mood to rights,
A savory flavor, the spice and the grease…
with more fried chicken, we could have world peace,
it would taste so good that we'd just want more,
be too busy eating to have time for war.

Doused in Cajun spice, or southern-style,
it's a meal you'll remember for a while,
cut into tenders, fun for the kids,
shape to a filet, you'll be glad you did,
load it with barbeque, sweet-and-sour,
put it on a waffle at breakfast hour,
you can shape it into tasty nuggets,
or take it old school, in a big bucket,
it's nearly as good cold as when it's warm,
for most common foodstuffs, that's not the norm.

Some folks get nervous about this delight,
since chicken has its own stereotypes:
Black folks like friend chicken, I think that's true,
since everybody does, no matter the hue.
Honestly, can you think of on single place
where people don't clamor for this fine taste?
Even doctors who say we must watch our weight,
in secret declare, 'Fried chicken is great! '
The vegans say they hate it, think meat is bad,
this must be the reason they're always mad,
if I had to lie, deny what I crave,
I'd probably be stalking 'round in a rage.

And so I will shout it, near everywhere,
call me a paid shill, I just do not care,
beyond Cornell recipe nothing can beat
the taste of a chicken fried in high heat,
try to deny this, it cannot be done,
fried chicken is truly made of awesome.