Full House Poem by Randy Johnson

It's very frustrating because fifteen people live in my house.
Six of them are my relatives and the rest are relatives of my spouse.
We're packed in like sardines and I can't even breathe.
I've tried and tried but I can't get the freeloaders to leave.
They eat all of my food and I've never been reimbursed.
My wife wants me to leave but I was here first.
My brother-in-law got my sister pregnant and she's going to have twins.
I want somebody to shoot me to get me out of this mess that I'm in.