Vallerie Lobell

Here Comes The Night - Poem by Vallerie Lobell

Another day has come and gone, I keep feeling something's wrong,
I worry too much, Jude, the boys, Mama and such,
But there's something lurking, I try to think but my mind's not working,
What's wrong with me I will never know, this is just how my life goes,

The house is quiet with no distractions, I wonder to what I am reacting,
I did not walk the field today, got no work done, why I can't say,
I spoke to my love which I was not doing, several times I started boo-hooing,
Why do I feel that a day has been wasted, tears are not new, many I've tasted,

But I feel in my bones that something's amiss, I hate when I get restless like this,
I think I am misunderstood by myself, I know cause my life sits on a shelf,
If I knew how the change to make, I would gladly do whatever it takes,
To feel some calmness in this old heart, unease is now tearing it apart,

I keep writing to let feelings out, I wish I knew what I was talking about,
I sit here doing this most every night, can't seem to make the broke thing right,
Is it the losses I am counting, when I should look upon the blessings mounting?
I want to run, something inside will burst, oh with depression I am cursed,

What do I need, what am I lacking, to what insanity am I attaching,
I look forward to nothing, not even my love, I expect nothing from heaven above,
I wish only to... what...can't think of a thing, that's the lack of direction loneliness brings,
I no longer have goals to which I am striving, I know that I am merely surviving,

I will take my meds and be off to bed, a book may replace these thoughts in my head,
For I am too wierd to watch T V, I used to live for movies, what's happened to me?
What good is it from a book to be learning, my heart is not here, it's away yearning,
For something it cannot even define, oh I know that I am losing my mind,

I know I could go on forever here writing nonsense, but sleep now seems so inviting,
There lies the only peace that I find, in making us to sleep the Lord is kind,
I don't want to seem ungrateful in any way, so I thank you God for this day,
And beg you to help me get things right, for the day is gone, but here comes the night,

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Poem Submitted: Sunday, August 6, 2006

Poem Edited: Monday, August 23, 2010

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