I Do Not Know How To Shyly Admit The Failures Of My Heart, A Ghazal Of Yagana Changezi In Translation Poem by Ravi Kopra

I do not know how to shyly admit the failures of my heart
I do not know how to accept others' crimes as mine

I do not have to show my face to anyone, O sailor
I do not know how to lie to get off the boat alone

A mountain of my hardships someday will go away
I do not know how to kill myself, hitting my head against a chisel

I am afraid my heart will give up with just a little blow
I do not know how to suffer in grief, I cannot hold back my tears

A mystery myself, how can I tell who am I, what I am
I do not know how to make it understand though I understand it myself pretty well

***

the original in Urdu

mujhe dil kī ḳhatā par 'yās' sharmānā nahīñ aatā
parāyā jurm apne naam likhvānā nahīñ aatā

mujhe ai nāḳhudā āḳhir kisī ko muñh dikhānā hai
bahāna kar ke tanhā paar utar jaanā nahīñ aatā

musībat kā pahāḌ āḳhir kisī din kaT hī jā.egā
mujhe sar maar kar teshe se mar jaanā nahīñ aatā

dil-e-be-hausla hai ik zarā sī Thes kā mehmāñ
vo aañsū kyā piyegā jis ko ġham khānā nahīñ aatā

sarāpā raaz huuñ maiñ kyā batāoñ kaun huuñ kyā huuñ
samajhtā huuñ magar duniyā ko samjhānā nahīñ aatā