It's Hard To Say Poem by Chris Newlash

It's hard to say when I'll leave all I love behind...
It's hard to help you understand when words I still can't find.
It's hard to listen to all the voices who by me have stayed.
It's hard to forget the voice screaming at me that I've betrayed.

It's hard to live in a world where I do not belong....
It's hard remembering that alone is where nothing feels so wrong.
It's hard to pick myself back up when I am this exhausted.
It's hard to let go of all the things in my mind because I've lost it.

It's hard to say exactly when I will be gone...
It's hard to say my good-byes, even though I've thought it through so long.
It's hard to stop myself from all the things that I do.
It's hard to say no to all my ideas that I'm afraid to follow through.

It's hard to accept that my life has absolutely no meaning.
It's hard to change myself from this person I am being.
It's hard to let go of Earth and fly away above.
It's hard to leave behind all that I truly love.

It's hard to keep pushing though every locked door.
It's hard to go to bed crying, only wake up to cry some more.
It's hard to sleep at night when my mind is clouded with sighs.
It's hard to force a real smile, and show it in my eyes.