Just To Be 'Cool' Hip And With It Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

If I was born,
From a love shared and meant...
Why does it seem to me,
I have to endure being tormented...
By others who believe,
I'm not deserving of it given.

If I was born,
To express love felt to mean...
Why am I suspected,
Not to be sincere about it.
I'm not one to recite my 'bio'.

Who created how love should appear?
Or when one has achieved,
Preferences checked off a top ten list.
Who is it that created profiles to match,
Without meeting someone to sit and chat.
What about romance?
And where is the chemistry at?

If I was born,
From a love shared and meant...
Why does it seem to me,
I have to endure being tormented...
By others who believe,
I'm not deserving of it given.

If I was born,
To express love felt to mean...
Why am I suspected,
Not to be sincere about it.
If I'm not giving eye contact,
I'm not expecting eye contact back.

If I have to awaken each day,
More concerned about making a good impression...
What purpose am I serving,
If I choose to be myself without the charade?
I have yet to evict myself from my own space.
Although I must admit I have had those days,
I am less appreciative of who it is I am.

And if I don't feel a need to masquerade a mood,
Or adapt to an attitude for me that is 'not' real...
Just to be 'cool' hip and with it,
I wont and could care less who addresses this.

And...
If someone believes I am not a good catch,
I am not about to get out of the pond soaking wet...
To sit near it rolling my eyes pouting.
With my arms folded across my chest,
Doing my best I've been rejected routine.
I save those scenes when I am at home alone.