Lost Poem by Vi Lanflagle

At times i feel
Like I'm drowning in my own little world
And I'm afraid that i'll never resurface
Afraid that all is lost.
And yet
I can smile and act like nothing's wrong.
But something is wrong, very wrong.

Inside i'm a mumbo jumbo
Of mixed feelings. Emotions
Running haywire, my mind is going crazy
I'm going crazy
And my whole world is falling apart.

I'm overflowing with fear,
Overflowing with sadness, anger, hatred,
Most though, i can't name.

I'm going to burst into flames
Going to erupt
I need to share the burden
Of having both my worlds on my shoulders
One on each side.

My fake reality is growing
Stronger.
I'm fading from reality
And going deeper into what i think is real.

I made my reality
So that i could escape from the world
And it ended up taking over my life.
Now i have escaped
And even though i was sorry to leave
I'm happy to know that i'm back in the real world
With people i didn't create
But only ignored to make my reality seem more than it was.

(Summer 05)