A girl. An abused child relentlessly torn down by her peers in school.
Growing up got harder every year. Some new insecurity or some stupid boy. Her friends leaving, the abuse getting worse.
She was ripped to shreds. She picked apart her appearance in the mirror nearly every day.
She was in such a dark place, she couldn't eat. For days at a time, she would eat only lunch. When what she would call a 'binge day' happened, she felt good. She didn't realize she was slipping into an eating disorder. For years.
She had developed crippling social anxiety. She was stuck. She couldn't tell her parents because they'd never understand.
Just when it was all getting bad, she met a boy. A friend, at first. He made her happier than she had been since her early childhood. Her friends all told her, 'You like him.' She didn't like him, did she? She was somehow unsure. Her friends eventually convinced her that he liked her. Guilt overtook her one day. She couldn't help it but she felt so stupid. How can someone be uncertain of there own feelings? She broke down. Real tears that rolled down her cheeks. She hadn't cried like that in years. So, she asked him to be honest. He had feelings for her. She explained what she was feeling and he said not to force anything. Her guilt was eased but not completely gone. She hated the feeling. He asked her how she was or what she ate every day.
He was her motivation for recovery. And she wasn't sure? How could she be such an idiot? She decided to give herself some time. After some time, her feelings became clear. It was the thought of him gone forever that made her realize how much he really meant to her. Experiencing death had never made her cry, even family, but just the thought crushed her. She knew this meant something. She thought to herself for a moment. She now knew.
She was truly at peak happiness for the first time in too long.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem