Nouveau Riche Poem by gershon hepner

I’d rather be a nouveau riche
than some impoverished veteran.
I’m looking for a nouveau niche
that’s hopefully a better ’un
than that which I now occupy,
without resources that the rich
have, whether old or nouveau––I
don’t really think it matters which.
Too long I’ve been a nouveau poor.
It isn’t fun, you don’t get used
to poverty, the only cure
that gives my poverty a boost
is taking out new credit cards
that have a pleasing plastic glow,
ignoring all the crass canards
I hear from those to whom I owe
a fortune. They must know I won’t
repay them––can’t when nouveau poor!
Repayment cannot be my wont
till I have nouveau riche allure
to help me keep up with expenses,
impoverished by nouveau schemes.
Till creditors come to their senses
I can’t fulfill my nouveau dreams,
a man who, though a nouveau poor,
would rather he were nouveau riche,
though unrealistic, to be sure,
more real than those men who eat quiche.

12/27/99,3/30/08