Prioritized And Lifted Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

I knew too well,
What my life had been like.
And that loneliness no one could touch.
I was deeply mentally scarred and troubled.
Yes...
I had been there.

I knew too well,
The masking of pretensions.
And the smothering of those emotions...
Afraid to let anyone see them show.
I have been there,
To numb them...
With alcohol or weed.
I have been there with a broken heart,
Many times to feel inside me bleeding.

I knew too well,
What my life had been like.
And that loneliness no one could touch.
I was deeply mentally scarred and troubled.
I had been there.
And going back,
I don't intend to do.
To feel again pain is not one of my pursuits.

Not back to back to scrape my knees!
Naw.
I don't think so.
Even with knee pads...
That's not happenin'!

Being at a place that drains to remain there?
For purposes to have others see one unchanged...
Is a selfishness that provides for them comfort!
And I know that kind of environment too well!

I had been there too.
Doing just that!
Providing others comfort at my expense.

Now I provide my own comfort.
Which to me makes much more sense...
In the maintaining of my peace of mind and happiness.
And those who proclaim I have changed...
As if one's purpose in life is to remain the same,
Are right!
I decided my life had to be prioritized and lifted,
To the top of my list and agenda!

And those who believe this is against God's wishes,
Have no connection to God!
I had been there myself...
To undo that kind of ignorance!