Ranking It Poem by Mary Angela Douglas

(for Valerie Macon, for grace under fire)

let us have the ranking of poets

the rambunctious Chorus sang

getting the New Year off to a bang

I said like Alice in a queasy dream

making way for the Rose Red Queen:

oh why stop there really why stop anywhere

let's rank it all, from the big to the small

let us rank meteors for their brightness

squirrels tails for rampant bushiness

old rocks for rockiness and who's been here longest

all the wrong for the wrongest

cream for its freshness (also, bonnets)

every cat and mouse for sonnets

would be Nessies for their nessness

chess players for their penultimate chessness

for starting the day out right

when the competition is a little tight:

the breakfast of all breakfasts:

toadstools for which is the most efficacious

to thin the rankings down

till there're no more rankings left in town

except for the Poisoner's.

mary angela douglas 9 january 2022