Spider Gus - Poem by Herbert Nehrlich
A spider lived in our shower.
I named him Gus, he was a perv,
would hang there hour after hour,
quite motionless, with steely nerve.
His eyes lit up when someone nude
stepped inside to perform some cleaning.
And Gus was always in the mood
to leave his web, you get my meaning,
dropp down to get a closer look
at all the goodies on display.
The closeness of the water shook
the spider's web, to his dismay.
One night a man went in the shower
to wash some remnants off his Willie.
'Twas rather late, the twilight hour
and Gus came down, felt rather silly.
And, as it was he got excited,
which was then further hightened yet
when from the bedroom now alighted
the female partner, out of bed.
He stared at her with greed and lust,
forgot that his arachnoid member
was rather small and in December
the turbulence will always get you,
if you get close they may not let you
retrace your steps to safer ground.
And this my friend is what transpired:
Fully erect he fell and drowned
and in the drain he then expired.
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