That's What Makes America Cool, You Know? Poem by Richard Jarboe

With apology to Bruce Willis...

we don't wrap our women up in burkas,
we like bikinis on the beach,
we invented hula hoops and frisbees,
we tolerate what anyone may preach,
we got chicken in every pot,
cars in every parking lot,
that's what makes America cool, you know?

we can only smoke cigarettes on the street,
we strap our babies down in a car seat,
if you come here you will learn,
we're cautious at every turn,
every chick and dude knows all about health food,
we play rock and roll with attitude,
that's what makes America cool, you know?

for the most part we win the wars we fight,
for the most part we know wrong from right,
we got sports and movies on our t.v.
twenty- four seven, sea to shining sea,
the casinos here are ace,
we handle our toxic waste,
that's what makes America cool, you know?

Lots of people sneak into our country,
Very few people try to sneak away,
pretty soon, we'll be back on the moon,
if you say we can't, you'll soon change your tune,
there ain't nothing we can't do,
Man, we're the red, white, and blue,
that's what makes America, cool, you know?
That's what makes America cool.