'These Are Desperate Times For You, Aren'T They? ' Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

If,
I were fed pigeon...
Would I then have pigeon vision?

If I were a duck,
After being plucked...
Would I then run out of luck?

And if I had an oink,
But a sheep I thought myself to be.
Would I want my pork chops fried...
Knowing a pig was meant to be my destiny.

And if I sneezed by a bee...
Will that bee that buzzed believe,
What I did was dumb...
To deserve a stinging,
Stung done that comes.

And if I had an oink,
But a sheep I thought myself to be...
Ooo ooo weeee.
Would that bee that did the stinging,
Wish it had hooves...
And,
Kicked me in the knee!

'These are desperate times for you,
Aren't they? '

Why do you say that?

'Your stimulus package,
Seems to lack stimuli.
And...
I am concerned for your well being.'