You Will Have To Manifest More Than A Passing Interest Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

It's been quite sometime since I've breast fed.
Or had my running mucoused nose wiped.
Or had my tears dried because of a neighborhood fight,
With a bully that had one time frightened me!

Soon after my eighteenth birthday,
I voluntered and 'joined' the military.
Feeling patriotic and hypnotized by war,
And doing my part to defend a country we all live in!
While others I knew...
Went on to colleges to pursue a certain greed.
That ego wasn't there for me to feed.
And two weeks after my high school graduation...
I was stripped from my childhood,
Dramatically.

Homesickness?
I've seen some guys try to walk home from bootcamp!
And I did stupid stuff...
Wanting my training instructor to find ways to punish me!
Walking to Connecticut from Texas,
Somehow was not a priority or an appetizer.

Today...
After broken marriages and mucho heartbreak.
Death of loved ones I 'knew' I could not endure.
And having ignorance thrown in my face...
By those who 'still' had no idea of the emotions felt,
I alone had to replace by a craze I successfully kept hidden.
And doing that with the grace from God?
Just to have judgements passed upon me...
Like someone was assigned to do that as if it was their job?
I forgave,
Before I even ate in those days!

I know I have been blessed to have survived much 'mess'.

I'll confess this to anyone who wishes to listen...
You have no idea of those things I've could have said,
But kept them to myself.
And have only 'selected' a few of those experiences,
To share to keep an interest flowing.
Isn't that what writers should do?
To give readers like you an insight?
Something to 'touch' the inside of a mind like mine?

And I will not totally embrace anyone 'inside'.
Not for a tour.
To rate the degree of my sufferings.
I don't keep that on exhibit anyway!
What would be the point?

My writings will hint with vivid 'suggestions'.
That's it!
Anything more than that?
You will have to manifest more than a passing interest.
But don't worry.
There is enough here to keep it coming to you,
For as long as you live!
Because in just this one life I've been given...
I feel I have lived many lifetimes.
None of which I wish to forget!
Making my happiness much more appreciated.