June FeirCruz

June FeirCruz Poems

I have reconciled the thought that our paths will never cross again
All the pain from a lifetime ago I thought would have dissipated
I turned my life upside down to be with you
I trusted you, and you let me down.

Am I to be blamed for that moment in time?
Did I underestimate you?
Was I careless with you?
The sin of my youth, my disgrace.

I played all my cards
I took the chance
Of being wanted by you

Love will always be a game
Men want to hunt
Women have to be hunted
If you give in too soon

'Never again, would I want to feel the hurt
Of feeling so jaded and so lost' I heard you say
I see such fear and honesty in your eyes
I know you have your own share of dissolution

I have always been an open book to you
I allowed you to read me so that you may know me.
I dedicated each chapter of my life for your mind and heart
I gave you footnotes for every detail of my life.

(as inspired by Dr. Subhendo Kar of India in one of his comments. Thank you, Dr. Kar)

'Love and hate two sides of a coin'
'Like two souls juxtaposed'

Good night, my love whereever you are
Whoseever arms enfold you, may you find peace.
May you rest in a soft pillow that cradles your head
May you hold her close to you till the morning sun.

As I sit alone in this cold lonely night
I feel as though my heart has broken
I am prepared to pick up the million shattered pieces
Just to see your face again.

I hope that you realize your confessions are a burden to me
Much as I love you like a brother, your words are corrupting me
I don't really know what possesses you to unburden yourself to me
Is 'sister confessor' tattoed in my forehead for everyone to see

I dared to dream of you
In my darkest hour
In my time of self doubt and pain
I dared to dream of you

Your hands may be rough and calloused,
Yet they touch me with such tenderness
And they feel like velvet in my skin.
Your skin is red from the sun,

Tender moments that stemmed from a kiss
Though uncertain of the future all this may bring
I allowed myself to give you all the love that my heart can muster
And devotion that is felt from the deepest recessess of my soul.

For years I have been silent
I hold a beautiful secret you and I share
For years I have no expectations from you
Not your love, not your hand to hold unto

Sad to say
You are just a cat's cradle to me
Just something to do
So I woudn't be so lonely

I didn't know what was lacking in my life, till I found you
You broke into my time and space and rescued me from my pain.
I didn't know what love is, till you showed me the way
I no longer dwell in solitary confinement and you freed me from all my fears.

I kissed a virtual stranger in real life
And my life has ended as I know it.
My life has been a roller coaster of sorts
Ups and downs and ups in dizzying speed

He didn't choose you
You chose him.
He didn't stand a chance -you latched on to him.
He was way too young

How many times did we say goodbye to each other?
How many times did we say such hurtful words?
How many times did you distrust me and my ways?
Countless days and nights, I weep endlessly.

Someone told me I should be used to it by now:
Being ogled at and objectified
The curse of being a HOT FILIPINA WOMAN
The curse of being an attractive woman.

June FeirCruz Biography

I am based in Los Angeles, California USA. For as long as I can remember; I have always been an inquisitive and artistic person. Besides writing poetry, I enjoy playing the guitar or the piano on my free time and I appreciate art in all its forms. I write about love, longing, friendships, empowerment - especially empowerment as a woman, the complexities and dynamics of relationships in this day and age. I would like to reiterate that some of my work are fiction and I also derive inspiration from people around me - be it from a word or an anecdote I am told. Names and facts are changed to protect the innocent and the not so innocent :) I have been encouraged time and again by my family and friends to continue writing and finally I have decided to share my work to the world.)

The Best Poem Of June FeirCruz


I have reconciled the thought that our paths will never cross again
All the pain from a lifetime ago I thought would have dissipated
I turned my life upside down to be with you
I trusted you, and you let me down.

Like a bullet with my name on it, you are back in my life
And though my first impulse is to loathe you, I couldn't turn my back
I want to take one last look at you, to see what you have become
If the sacrifice we both have made cleared your path to see the dawn.

As for me, I have no complaints
The trappings of wealth, I now possess
A beautiful home in a leafy enclave is where I live
But I will always wonder 'What If'?

So, now that you have spoken to me and heard my voice
I hope that the closure you long for is now resolved
No matter how and what you feel
Understand, I made a choice I have to adhere to, till the end

June FeirCruz Comments

Les Derbyshire 17 September 2009

June, you are an honest, observant and passionate writer. Your diverse styles reflect so well the issues and feelings you write about. I can return again and again to read and enjoy your work. You are an inspiration!

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