Cookie Matzii

Autumn's Agonizing Roar - Poem by Cookie Matzii

I think it's about time to write a poem again.
I can't even remember the date I wrote the last piece I've written.
Inspiration hit me; I knew I had to put everything down.
I don't really know what it was, but, there, I left the broom and the pan on the ground.

It's raining hard today, actually, only this time of night.
Awhile ago it was so hot, my squinted eyes couldn't see a sight.
It's raining hard, the drops are all I could hear,
but then, they would stop. Is it gone or still near?

Could we just pause everything now before this second is over?
When that lightning flashed...please make it last forever.
But I know forever doesn't exist; that's all cr*p and bullsh*t.
We've been lied to and controlled; in classrooms, we had to stay and sit.

I'm so sick of school; work overload day and night,
while my interests are thrown out; can't even fly a kite.
It's all listen, obey, work, not an individual's say.
I'm doing what you want while my soul's crushed every f*cking day.

Right now I'm very torn, mistreated, misunderstood.
I'd end this painful life right away only if I could.
But that would cause too much misery to those I truly love,
and I wouldn't be able to comfort them if I were there, above.

I don't even know what to feel anymore;
my mind's sapped and my body's sore;
my eyes have run dry cos I can't do anything but cry.
A lot of things are in my head, but right now, I could only ask, 'Why?
Why was I even born? Please just undo it, let's go back to the past.
Why can't we pause this moment, this time, while everything's here? Why can't we make any of this last? '

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Poem Submitted: Sunday, August 15, 2010

Poem Edited: Friday, January 14, 2011

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