Adoption Poems: 113 / 500

Church Business

Rating: 5.0

A preacher named Adrian Finn
had considered that living in sin
with a nubile young maid
who'd ensure he'd get laid
would bestow a perpetual grin.

An enraged and surprised congregation,
after thorough consideration,
voted twenty to one
that he'd live with a nun
who would practice, each day, flagellation.

Said the elders 'A priest must abstain',
lest the practice would render insane
all the good in his head
through the deeds of the bed.
He agreed since God's rules were quite plain.

Thus the nun took up residence soon
she would sing, sometimes whistle, a tune.
A seduction took place
when she sat on his face,
she was under the spell of the Moon.

It was night and he knew it was wrong,
but the urge to be carnal was strong.
Like old Jefferson Bill
he did savour the spill,
was it sex without using your schlong?

He could probably claim that he had
been a party to some kind of fad.
Thus it wouldn't be sin
if he hadn't been in
he was livid, still rigid, but glad.

Said the nun 'will you now be my master,
we have entered the zone of disaster,
if you hurry inside
we shall go for a ride,
and the ride will go faster and faster.'

As he still was a trifle dismayed,
she took action and soon got him laid.
At first light (which is Dawn)
he went out to the lawn
and he preached that they'd REALLY prayed.

After thirty-six weeks they could tell
that the nun who was Sister Adelle,
had dropped weight overnight
and they thought that she might
be in trouble and really unwell.

But the preacher came up with a fable,
they'd received from Morocco a cable,
and had taken the option
of a hurried adoption
then she showed them the boy, on a table.