I have a negative freedom.
This kind of freedom isolates me, and
weakens me all the time.
The most important wounds are on my heel and in my soul.
I broke my heel of soul
in wrestling with my love for life.
Maybe some gigantic forces are beyond my control.
Today, because of my old injuries,
I cannot go on with my life.
The soul injury was much more serious than I was told.
So, I'm abandoned to live in my suffering.
I try to be a modern person; I try to be rooted
in the complexity of the social forces,
but my attitude is always a passive one.
Although, I need to survive this battle,
because it is my own battle.
My world has collapsed.
Do I really need freedom? Don't make me laugh.
I began to think of my positive, new world
and of the self-determination it entails.
I am anchored in what I am, because of my right heel
and because of my left wing of the soul.
They don't let me hope.
I spend my time doing whatever I have to do to survive.
I pray for something real to come and to save me.
‘Twas raining last night and I had
a wonderful dream.
I was slipping into a happy world.
God, I miss that dream so much!
Copyright © Marieta Maglas. All rights reserved.
Topic(s) of this poem: confessional