Cruelty Of Being Poem by Hasan Haskovic

Everything, everything
Seemed stoic
Reasonable at the time
Just five years old
Everything, everything seemed so sublime
Not even introduced to the harsh world

Now
I find myself lacking
The comprehensiveness
My once small hands had
Hands that could hold the world
The world that watched me
As I turned somber and sad

I'm not the table owner
I'm not one for the crowd to see
Just another shady loner
Leave me alone, let me be

And not even the sunlight
Seems to shine through
Thoughts as heavy and dim
I know I should be trying to absolve it
I know I should let go of this sin

But just letting go
Never made sense to me
So many things unsaid
So many thoughs unfree

So I'm just sitting here
Witnessing the cruelty of being
Maybe I just never tried hard enough
Yet failure is something I'm always seeing
In my wake

You'd say
I never really tried at all
To break this hand on my throat
I'm not ready yet
To breathe freely

I'll choke just a little longer

Don't point out my mistakes
Just let me be
I'll fix this
I swear
And once past this ignorance and bliss
I'll find someone who'll care

'till then
Don't remind me of my faults
I know them better than you
I know them better than anyone
You haven't been where I have
You don't feel what I do

Everything, everything used to make sense
Now all I ever think of is of letting go
Of being free

But just letting go
Never made sense to me