Day Surgery Poem by Barney Rooney

Day Surgery

Rating: 4.8

I'm a day case for surgery
ready by the bed
arrived at 7 on the table by 11
out at 5 unless I'm dead
nurse leads me to a booth
for the gown and the paper pants
took blood pressure checked my d.o.b
when she's satisfied that I'm me
I get a smile - wait a while
the anaesthetist is next
runs through all the checks
to make sure I'll go to sleep
..and wake up
with my crowns and all my teeth
then the surgeon breezes in
says he's seen the scan
and he'll do the best he can
endoscopic - not much more to say
he'll go in the smallest way
shouldn't trouble me a lot
just doozing off on the top
of the bed when
along come two boys in blue
all the twos
two of them
too hearty by far
to put me at ease
say they'll walk me down
and wheel me back
giving it a bit of crack
into the chill chill air of the
anaesthetists' ante-chamber
hello jump up lie down give us your arm
breath that deep fresh country air
count us and then to 10
an ice-cold current
shoots up your vein
and a distant woman's voice
keeps calling your name
asks if you're in any pain
wheeling you round a bend
the rasp of the curtain
drawn along the rail
closes and you're done..

the surgeon is back says it went OK
got it out and sent it away
cut out some bone and put in a splint
dab it with a bit of lint if it bleeds too much

the nurse is back
something to eat?
scouse humour's a treat
but she's not joking
no, need to get you on your feet
pulse, pass water, eat
a ham sandwich and breath
constitutes the standard test
for post operative readiness
to be on your way
you've had your day
the food arrives - white bread ham and mustard
tea in a cup
there's been a JCB right up
my nose scraping out a sinus tumour
I've never sucked a sandwich before
but anything's worth a go
and the truth to tell
the acidity of the mustard cuts in quite well
with the residual taste of rare tissue
then to the toilet to try to issue
some urine
but not having taken liquid for 10
hours this dribble is sad
but a dribble is passed, test complete
across the cubicle floor a leap
to phone the daughter
can you pick me up love
what time tomorrow dad she says
not tomorrow now today
says she'll be there right way
and she is
I shuffle down the corridor on her arm
like a broken old man
with a swab on my nose dripping blood

I had this done before 5 years ago
It was a 2 night stay then, far too slow
lost 2 pints of blood so couldn't leave
gave me an extra night to sleep
still I left with no receipt
for the blood
now, unwanted in this echoing hospital
weak, tired and feeling sore
struggle the length of a corridor
then almost trampled by a scrambling hoard
chalk stripe suits and jangling merc keys
off for hire
on the next shift for BUPA at the local Spire
and the lesser mortals doubling up
waiting for hubby to pick them up
in the Astra
for the checkout at ASDA
we are all in this together
some bleed
some have mouths to feed
some take full reward
claim they plight their troth
but its hard to feed the lifestyle with
a Hippocratic oath

Monday, December 29, 2014
Topic(s) of this poem: hope

It was last like a short story, but you made it as poem, great. Thank you.

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Noreen Carden 30 March 2015

This is just brilliant Barney well done

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