Defending My Right To Exist Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

Defending my right to exist...
Didn't leave too much time,
To feel insecurities.
Or get emotional about them.
I was always reminded that I wasn't who I was!

I looked like so and so,
And spoke like someone else.
And living in a place where nicknames were preferred,
It was rather difficult to maintain an identity.
Since being clownish and down to Earth,
Was a lesson taught.
And to be ignorant was the main objective.
Few people dared to express knowledge of anything.

Hey,
What can I say?
Even today...
This is not an exaggeration.

Needless to say,
Folks still living in that same mindset...
Seem not to be able to understand,
Why their visits to jails and prisons...
Are more frequent and have more of a priority,
Than when their 'children' were misbehaving in schools.
And teachers are blamed for this?

Defending my right to exist,
Didn't leave too much time,
To feel insecurities.
Or get emotional about them.
I was always reminded that I wasn't who I was!

However...
I was told I 'thought' I was better than everyone else,
Because I spoke as if I was 'intelligent'.
You know,
Clear and not like a...well...
Bunny rabbit!
And I had more than being a 'bad' little boy,
With going to jail on my mind.
I wanted to have my own identity for some reason.
With a wish to be successful at whatever I chose to do!

And there are those who try to convince others,
My accomplishments do not mean a thing!
And to them,
I wouldn't expect that they would.
Since I've lived to witness...
What many of them regard as important.
And hearing the children who brag,
About how much jail time they have served.