Fall In Love? Poem by Nathan Barkley

I breath heavily
I can't keep my hands steady
I know I'm not ready
I can't help this feeling that screams inside
With each beat
I come closer to that strange yet familiar time
Where everything seems perfect and stops forever
I can't believe it, i want to live and die at the same time
I know if i open up i would just end up falling into darkness with no light
Keep it hidden, keep it bury, keep it aside
Don't let these little insignificant moments grow
twirling around, with its roots piercing my heart
Don't let the happiness and attraction show

Even tho i want to cry
I feel like a cloud in the sky
I know i shouldn't look into those beautiful eyes
striking my very soul each time
my heart knows that you hold secrets and lies
Your smile engraved in this filthy mind
Making it bleed and leaving a mess inside
what a perfect monument of unattainable beauty you are
even the stars burn up with jealousy, leaving behind nothing except the dark
I know its wishful thinking that this time is different
but should i let my self die once more?
Fall in love with another soul?
Fall in love with the person you hold inside?