Fat Poem by Alicia Meyers

Teenagers pick on the people who are weak,
Weak because they lost all their strength,
Strength in which made them who they were,
Were because now they are weak because of you.

Teens that bully are bored,
So they entertain themselves by laughing,
Laughing at others pain and suffering,
Until that person dies of unhappiness.

You've locked them up inside a cacoon,
Not being able to get out and smile,
Laugh with the jokes,
Or being brave enough to listen to the cruel words you leave upon them.

For five years, I was locked up inside that cacoon,
I didn't want to leave to show my rolled up skin,
To show my stomach and waist line,
To show that I'm weak and I'll cry myself to sleep.

For five years, I suffucated in the death-eating-cruelity-words,
I heard the word 'fat, ' 'hippo, ' and 'whale' too many damn times
Making me think that it's real,
Or hoping that it's fake.

For five years, I cried inside after I ate something,
Wishing that I didn't put it inside my mouth,
Praying to God that no one would make fun of me,
Because of my weight.

I look at some skinny girl and I cry,
Wishing I was them,
Wishing that I could have her body,
Hoping that one day I would look that.

But instead it was the other way around,
I grew larger - not in height but in weight,
I walked a little bit but then I gained more,
I do so many things yet all I do is gain.

Why must this curse be on me?
Why must this cruel body of mine makes me feel insecurity?
Why must every girl and boy look at me and laugh?
Why must I feel this way?

I thought that I was learning a lesson,
A lesson to be taught to my children and grandchildren and others unknown,
A lesson so that everyone can live in peace,
But nothing will change life as it just stays the same.

If only people could walk a thousand miles in my shoes,
If only people knew what felt like to be me,
If only people could see that appearance isn't the problem,
If only people could be nice to everyone.

You see some big girl walking down the street,
And you laugh and make fun of her,
How would you like it if people made fun of you?
What if someone you love insulted you so much that you cried yourself sleep?

How would you feel if you had so much insecurity,
That someone gave you a compliment and you take it as an insult,
And so you don't believe anyone who says nice things to you?
And when someone insults you - you cry so much that you cut yourself to make it feel better.

I wish that you knew what it was like,
To feel unwanted,
To feel guilty,
To look fat.