Hoda Elomari

Final Decision - Poem by Hoda Elomari

I have drawn a conclusion to my world of thoughts,
I have made a decision one that will not be sold and cannot be bought,
For marriage is not apart of me,
It will not set my soul at ease and it cannot set me free,
And for those who say it will cure ones misery,
I agree,
But I will not believe that it be me,
What I want no longer exists,
And if it does then it is taken,
And if not taken, than it is not interested,
And maybe its there, but will not try to find me,
Whatever it may be, I no longer care,
Whoever said, “love is the answer” lies,
And whomever says, “love is blind” tells the truth and brings tears to your eyes,
I have been alone all my life,
From the day I was born, until the day I die,
Therefore, for me to accept my opposite gender,
Believing their warmth, and allowing them to be tender,
Is very much unacceptable,
I wont understand it,
All of a sudden, in one moment my life completely changes, all because he wants me to believe he loves me and his love never ages.
I may not be the brightest child,
But I assure you, I know more about love and life then those who have had it, seen it and watched it die.
I have too much that I treasure,
And when I lose something I love, I know it won’t come back,
Understand, I don’t wanna love again after that,
Yes I know life is full of ups and downs,
And I know it brings smiles and allows frowns,
But it’s not my fault I’m the way I am,
I just can’t accept pain, because I think I’ve seen more than my share of it,
And as you can see, my heart and soul are weak and completely unfit,
Don’t think I’m setting up an illusion,
And No, I’m not trapped in any sort of confusion,
I woke up, and here I am,
Reality is in my face, and it won’t ever leave me again,
I’m drawn closer to this final conclusion,
I will not love,
And will not be loved,
Alas, I’ve found my solution…

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, April 4, 2006

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