Homer Poem by Herbert Nehrlich

'Twas the night before Christmas and Santa ran late
he had been rather busy with too much on his plate.
As they rounded the corner at the Post Office Square
they encountered a rather formidable bear.

As the bear was a grizzly and bigger than Nick
he was driving the reindeer to the side with his stick.
But the snow had been heavy and they lost it right then
heading straight for the grizzly with their vehicle, when,
from a sky came an angel with the words 'may God bless'
and now Santa could manage, he'd received ABS!

And the bear, who was happy that his life had been spared
he went over and told them how he utterly cared,
and he petted the reindeer with his scruffy big paw
when the littlest one fainted at the feet of his Ma.

Yelled the mother 'you monster, you have killed my own child
I will hunt you and chase you, all the way to the wild! '
And the bear who had wanted to be kind, to belong
was bewildered and saddened as he hadn't done wrong.
It was over in minutes and the snow turned to crimson
thus today it's not Santa but that strange Homer Simpson.