How Dare You Be Honorable Still Poem by Mitzi Kesterson

How could you?
How could you give them all a chance?
How could you move so much more quickly with them
So that they didn't just fall through your fingers?

Like I did.
Like you let me.
Oh, this poison of yours hurts!
I still shudder violently six-no seven, now-years later.
So what if I swallowed it willingly?
So what if I didn't hold my breath,
Cross my fingers,
Make the first move?
How could-what? -seven days
Make me so miserable for just as many years?

How can you breathe,
And go on,
Do the right thing always,
When you might guess that I'm here,
Regretting every tingle, every pull that I imagined?

How can you go on making the good choices
When I would never have done that to you?
(See? I didn't!)
I would have let your absence destroy me.
(See? I prove myself each day.)