'I Loved You' Poem by Fallen Too Far

'I Loved You'



I said something irregular.
It slipped out in a whisper
Soft and raspy, accompanied with a box
Tied in ribbon
Filled with my most precious,
My words dipped in all honesty
I left on your ear to wait
For you to answer me
But you never did
Just looked at me and stood into the night
With tears running down your face
And I wondered how I had let it come
And escape the way it did
So sharp so sudden so unstoppable
Like a heart for the beat
I waited for it like the morning
To come that never does
And I fell short of knowing
Why it had ever been uttered
This estranged syllable of devotion
In such uncertain circumstances

I watched you slip away from me
Into the silence so full
Of your thoughts, only drowned out by mine
The wall running it's course
Steady through the ribbons of your heart
And the patterns it made upon mine
I discovered a hole
And through it a dam broke through
As I slipped under
The realization that you were never for me to hold
And i yearn for the moment
In rewind, where your lips ached for mine
In mingling silence of the trees

But time has ripped the last words from my lips
And there is no going back.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Geoff Warden 24 August 2007

Very nicely done, words spoken state the truth of the emotions felt, and of the unding law that we can never look back.....my only suggestion would be to look back in the thoughts of the second chance.......and know the feelings of reconcile

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Adeline Foster 17 August 2007

Your theme was clean and clear, I liked that. You did not clutter the poem with enigmatic metaphors designed to dazzle, I liked that. Your poem reminded me of a Russian author that I love. See if you do not agree? A dark veil, underneath she was twisting Her hands… “Why so shaken today? ” “I have sent him all sodden and listing With an excess of bitter dismay. I can’t bear it! He went from me, quailing, With his lips all distorted and grim… I flew down, never touching the railing, And I raced to the gate after him. And I gasped: “All that’s happened here lately, Forget; if you go, I am dead! ” His smile was so spectral and stately, “Go in out of the wind, ” he said. Kiev,1911 Anna Akhmatova

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