Neuschwanstein Castle Poem by Herbert Nehrlich

Fifteen hundred steps of stone
to the nearest telephone.
Up on top inside the tower
waking at ungodly hour,
with a crazy appetite.
So she says, 'perhaps we might
order pizza and a kettle,
garnished with a stinging nettle
and a handful of dead flies.
Also, I would like some pies,
those with Sauerkraut and jam
and the pizza must have ham.'

Well, we stayed in Ludwig's castle
which itself was quite a hassle,
she was pregnant, gravely so,
and, as some of you may know,
ladies bearing growing seeds
have their own, peculiar needs.
I detest to climb at night
just to serve my spouse a bite,
fifteenhundred steps of stone,
TWICE, but wait, she has a phone!
With a barely stifled curse
I retrieved it from her purse.
'Who to call', I asked my sweet,
she replied 'Call Pizza Pete',
so I did and felt a shiver,
Pete said 'Pizza, we deliver'.
It was four, the boy showed up,
out of breath with our grub.
She, the lady of my dreams,
then remarked 'Oh, my, it seems
that this pizza is ice-cold,
previously I have been told
that a meal from Pizza Pete
will, no matter, always meet
standards of discerning guests,
and that the decision rests
with the customer, of course.
(Briefly I thought of divorce) ,
when SHE picked up the telephone,
said 'Pete, this food is cold as stone',
and Pete said 'Have the boy return
if temperature is your concern.
We will replace it, worry not,
Pete's Pizza is delivered hot.'