No Poem by David Harris

Everyone wants a part of you
no matter whom you are
and most want your money.
They plague you with emails, telephone calls
or persistently knock on your door.
The more you say no,
the more they persist anyway
until you get rude and send them on their way.

Some churches send out callers
saying they’ll show you to the light.
I just tell them I’m a Preacher, I have my own church
and that gets rid of them.
I am not lying; I am a pretend Preacher with my own church.

Then comes the charities
wanting you to give money
for this and that.
My answer is always no
and tell them to see the government
as they have more of my money
than I ever get to see.

Up comes the utilities electric and gas,
on the door or on the telephone
about changing your supplier.
They always call when you’re in the middle
of doing something important.
I tell them no,
as I’m happy with my lot.

Next comes the man
with new windows, conservatory or porch.
They do not get much joy from me.
Nor do those who are trying to sell me
the newest gadget ridden phone.
If your wits are not about you,
you could end up with a half dozen of them.

Why don’t they all go to blazes
and just leave me alone.
After a days work I just want to relax
in my home sweet home.
Not get up every five minutes
to answer the door or the telephone.
This my time and I want it peaceful and quiet.

If there are any door-to-door beggars reading this,
stay away from my door,
as I don’t want anything you have to offer.
Hawkers of any kind just stay away
and leave my sanity alone.
If you phone me, I will politely tell you where to go
and when you get there,
I hope the Devil jabs you with his trident,
then my message will come through loud and clear.
My answer is NO.


23 September 2009