The Abc Poem by Spike Milligan

The Abc

Rating: 4.6

'Twas midnight in the schoolroom
And every desk was shut
When suddenly from the alphabet
Was heard a loud "Tut-Tut!"

Said A to B, "I don't like C;
His manners are a lack.
For all I ever see of C
Is a semi-circular back!"

"I disagree," said D to B,
"I've never found C so.
From where I stand he seems to be
An uncompleted O."

C was vexed, "I'm much perplexed,
You criticise my shape.
I'm made like that, to help spell Cat
And Cow and Cool and Cape."

"He's right" said E; said F, "Whoopee!"
Said G, "'Ip, 'Ip, 'ooray!"
"You're dropping me," roared H to G.
"Don't do it please I pray."

"Out of my way," LL said to K.
"I'll make poor I look ILL."
To stop this stunt J stood in front,
And presto! ILL was JILL.

"U know," said V, "that W
Is twice the age of me.
For as a Roman V is five
I'm half as young as he."

X and Y yawned sleepily,
"Look at the time!" they said.
"Let's all get off to beddy byes."
They did, then "Z-z-z."

Emily Bush 13 May 2009

Spike Milligans dead deary

13 40 Reply
Merv Heap 19 November 2009

Spike was so very erratic i guess he just forgot about some letters. After all, he was depressed for a lot of his life. True genius is never a smooth road : =(

21 21 Reply
Kieran Allemby 30 May 2012

gd poem a very good poem writer

30 10 Reply
Kt Not Telling U 06 May 2008

HAHAHA OMG! ! ! that's realli funny in a poetic sense. Im doing this poem 4 a project. does anyone know his email? ? ? :)

19 17 Reply
James Alexander 03 June 2007

kinda funny. were is the m and n though.

20 11 Reply
Lee Franks 13 December 2023

Amazing from the legendary Spike Milligan

0 0 Reply
Dr Antony Theodore 25 November 2020

X and Y yawned sleepily, " Look at the time! " they said. " Let's all get off to beddy byes." They did, then " Z-z-z." What a kind of imagination. tony

0 2 Reply
L Milton Hankins 11 October 2020

This poem makes so much sense! I enjoyed it very much, Spike!

0 0 Reply
Leah R 10 August 2020

Wow all da boomers came here go away karens

1 3 Reply
Lynn Crowther 02 April 2020

One of my favourite poems for children

2 0 Reply
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