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The Parting

Rating: 5.0
I remember the look on his dear face as he told me “I love you.”
I can see myself, heartbroken, saying that I loved him too.

I remember that I held his hand while he whispered “Goodbye, dear.”
I remember that I said “Don’t leave, ” and bedewed his face with tears.

I remember that he kissed my hands before he closed his eyes.
I looked up after he left me, for he left me for the skies.

I remember sitting by the bed, while he was dead and cold.
I remember feeling suddenly that I was strained and old.
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COMMENTS
Paul Hansford 27 July 2009
There is genuine feeling here, simply expressed, the best way to communicate emotions. The repetition of 'I remember' is not overdone, and the ending, with 'I knew' and 'I know', makes the whole experience an optimistic one.
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Laurie Hill 09 July 2009
Very poignant, beautifully written, so very moving.....could picture and feel the scene.....10+
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Jasmin Whyte 08 July 2009
'...........I remember feeling suddenly that I was strained and old.......' It's so true that to one so young death brings a certain accelerated maturity, but so glad you got to say 'goodbye'
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Susan Bagley 03 July 2009
Paige, Excellent and poignant for one so young. I felt as the writer felt and almost did not want to read on for the pain, but I did read on, such a good poem.
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For now I know he’s happier with the Lord; and one day, I’ll meet him there.... lot more happiness with Lord.. godd write and praise worthy......10 read mine rest in peace and butterflies around
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Sandra Martyres 27 June 2009
A very sad parting, very well scripted...10+
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