To Bear A Burden Without False Integrity Poem by Mikel Calcagno

There is a desire that plagues mankind. A desire that enslaves us all to serve with our faces upon the floor. A desire that no longer speaks to us through the crack upon the wall, but we settle for less just the same. We settle for any sign, for any word that shall propel us back unto the infinite fire we feel in our veins. Some may think that this is all pathetic, some may think that this may all be delusional, and that only people with certain mental conditions are incapable of self control. But desire has nothing to do with the self, nor does it really have to do with control. It all has to do with time. A limited existence hovering around our subconscious. The seconds that ticks within our bellies. The hunger that calls to our brains, and you still have not fed it, whatever it is, howling like a minutest wolf in our heads.

And like a vampire it lives in the shadows, behind the walls we tend to cage them in. One by one we set the stones around the mantel, and we lock the thing with rods and chains. I have been inside the fireplace; I have looked into that darkened hole. I saw what looked like a replication of my existence, but it was much darker, yet how it glowed. It glowed with a murky green color, the red velvet couches looked a little bit rusted, and I heard something calling to me. A warning… a deeply embedded warning and I told my hero within me to get away.

But there is still a major part missing to this story that I am now reliving. The fear of remembering has still not subsided, so I shall wait for sunrise to protect me from this blackness, this rotten stench of a century’s decay, to tell you about the desire, about my understanding of that horrible waiting around just to hear a sweetly addictive conversation. With an intent look that deforms us, which ages us while keeping us ever so young, that has our skin live in the moment for the rest of our lives, while the rest of our lives turns into dust.