When Nothing Matters Any More Poem by Amy Kerswell

Hi Amy, I read this poem and the one called Burning Flesh. These 2 poems have a lot of pain, sadness and lonliness in them. They also have a feeling of isolation and desolation too. I want to tell you something Amy, and I hope that you can take it in the light it is given. You are a young girl, and you have a lot of life to live yet. I hoope that you can see the brighter side of life soon, because there is a lot of decent things on that brighter side. You have read my poems Amy, ad you have seen the sadness in my soul. Everytime I get sad and write about it, there are friends that will give me advice and help with that sadness. I have been forced to go through a lot in my life, but for everything that was forced on me, I found the strength to go forward. Amy, I have 2 goals in my life right now. The first goal is to be the complete and physical female I should have been born as, and the second goal is to make sure my book Chrissie is published. These goals give me something to look forward to, and they keep me going. I have tried suicide twice, and was stopped each time. Now I commit suicide in my poems, so that my sadness and isolated feelings are released. Self harming is not a release tho Amy, it is a danger. The girl I introduced you too today feels much the same way you do a lot of the time, and when she is upset she self harms too, and I want her to stop this, because I really love her with all of my heart and soul. Amy, please, I am hoping that instead of self harming, you will take your pen, pencil, keyboard or whatever you have, and write your self harming down in a poem and share them with us, so we may give you our thoughts, advice and help. You are very young yet, and have a lot of life to live. Please don't end that life, because there are setbacks in your life. If anyone has a right to actually end her life and self harm, it is me. I have been raped, forced into other sexual things as well, beaten til I bled, and even beaten into unconcsiousness. But I go on. Amy, you can go on too. We find strengths in what we have been forced to go through in our lives, Amy. Finding this strength isn't easy, and is almost next to impossible at times, but we find that strength tho, and a lot of times in the most unlikely places. Amy I am praying for you, that you find these strengths, before it is too late, and I will also pray that you can see the brighter side of life, because there is a lot in that brighter side to actually enjoy and be h appy about. With super love and big as the sky hugs, Barbara 'If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be.'