Fear of rejection, by James Sebastiani
Another beautiful sunny day outside,
But inside my apartment i stay and hide,
...
New Life
Since the birth of the Universe, you've patiently waited,
But without consciousness, without substance,
...
If only
A summers day, beneath an oak tree,
It's broad leaves offer shelter, for you and me,
...
Down and out, by James Sebastiani
Sheltering in doorways,
Some dressed in rags,
...
Trick or treat
Buckets of blood, overflowing with entrails,
Decomposing, decapitated corpses,
...
The horrors of war, by James Sebastiani
It's that time of year, another November,
...
My Little Princess, by James Sebastiani
From the first day i saw you, so tiny and fragile,
My little Princess, ever so beautiful,
...
When does it end? I guess the decision is mine?
Every day, my mind is in decline,
Today, tomorrow, I battle with my past,
I don't know how much longer I can last.
...
Terrible poem
Getting to that time of night, had too much to drink,
Getting to that time of life, had too much to think,
...
Opportunity missed
Summer Solstice weekend, nineteen eighty two,
The Stonehenge free festival, was the venue,
...
Lifeboat
Whichever way the river flows,
is the way my meandering life will go,
...
Eternal Sleep
Just had a consultation with my shrink,
One of so many, i've had over the years,
...
Broken pieces
Broken pieces, scattered all around,
a broken man, waiting to be found,
...
Fiona
I first saw your face, on the Book of Faces,
A vision so lovely, a smile so divine,
...
Fear Of Rejection
Fear of rejection, by James Sebastiani
Another beautiful sunny day outside,
But inside my apartment i stay and hide,
Too many people, too much anxiety,
Hoping today will be one of sobriety
But once again, as often before,
I open the bottle, and begin to pour,
Another, and another, till the numbness begins,
Blocking all thoughts, of guilt, and my sins,
Punishing myelf, for the actions of others,
My sins, the hurt i've caused to friends and lovers,
Pushing away, alienating, and distancing myself,
From people who love me, and are concerned for my health,
I want to let them in, lower my defences,
but i fear, there are always consequences,
a price to pay, so i grab moments of joy,
whenever i can, then run like a coward, and redeploy,
onto the next, for a new fix of affection,
then once again run, before the rejection,
but in the process leaving a trail of pain,
of broken hearts, i wish i could refrain,
Allow myself to let people in, and not push them out,
to feel worthy of love, not be afraid, not to doubt,
to love myself, to welcome affection,
to break this habit, of running in the opposite direction