A poem discovers itself along
the line. Toggle an image free
from a fabric of words, and a poem
unravels, whole and complete...
There's the marble bench halfway
down the Azalea Way, and nearby
in a white leaf magnolia, a single
silk veil was left as a love token.
Three sparrows perch high above,
they display no impatience
about the human drama yet
to unfold. A block away, at a busy
coffee shop, a man and a woman share
gleeful intimacies over espresso and cream.
From the fabric of your words a picture formed in my mind, full of beautiful imagery and nature! Rhythm flowing into an image poised in poetry! Awesome writing, a man and woman in a café never seeing any of it. Amazing poem, really liked it quite a lot! Thank you for sharing it. RoseAnn
Thanks much Roseann I spent the summer of 1983 in Seattle with friends who had moved there. I set myself the goal finally to write poetry seriously and I have kept at composiiton ever since. I wrote in a notebook ideas and drafts. This poem came from unrelated comments on the same page but the sonnet pulled them together. It's truly, as you say, a fabric of words sewn together.
[...]A poem discovers itself along the line. Toggle an image free from a fabric of words, and a poem unravels, whole and complete...[...] Wow! It took me a few attempts to get it but you put up your 'theory' for the poem in these lines and work it out in the rest of it... A beautiful example of 'theory' and 'praxis' Daniel... Loved it...
That's exactly what this poem is: theory, then praxis. And the sonnet format makes the two different halves fit tightly together. Some poems I labor over, you KNOW what that's like. But others are as effortless as apples growing on an apple tree (that comparison is John Keats's) .
Really great poem. Seems like you've taken some technique from me? A poem in seven words, your first line. Funny dyslexia, I read dharma instead of drama... has interesting implications. Perhaps we can do something with a story to make it in the same fashion.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
So innovative the scenes to express those meanings and feelings at the same time for a theme one would think has nothing to do with all those things.Like the comody which makes you laugh by an unextected word, condition!
You identified the purpose and method of this poem perfectly! I like the connection to a COMEDY because the mood of this poem is upbeat and sunny. Any suggestion of dark clouds or tragedy would detract from the scene and the message. The message is: Be patient, the poem will happen in its own sweet time. Just be ready to write it down when it's fresh and whole.