Close To Acceptance Poem by Bill Galvin

Close To Acceptance

Rating: 5.0

My love, my wife…
Home now for so many months…
Laboring with a slowly diminishing Life-force
Since insidious ALS began its treacherous scheme
To draw you inexorably away from us.

You hold it away at arm's length
With a dignity that was always your hallmark;
With a bravery others can admire;
With a praiseworthy candor;
With a ………
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The above incomplete poem was begun at 1am,2-11-2015.
The subject was to be about the realization that Deb's end was near,
And I was close to being ready to accept it,
But I still had to stay working hard to keep it at bay,
As she had for so long.

Then Deb became weaker during the day,
And passed on 2-11-2015 at 9: 55pm ET.

Her last hours were spent listening to our favorite music.
I told her that if she went before me
She would remain on the seat next to me as copilot and navigator;
And I asked her if she would be my guardian angel…
She blinked "Yes" with her eyes,
Too weak to answer with raised eyebrows as usual.
I read her some of my poetry dedicated to our journey together.
I showed her pages of photos of our life together from our website.
She sobbed when she saw pictures of herself as a young lady.

She calmed after I opened our wedding page.
I told her I had just added the music she had selected for our wedding
Which made the page complete.
Pachelbel Canon in D Major began playing
As the slideshow of wedding pictures from 1983 rolled.
I was still holding her left hand in my right under the covers
As she lay on her left side
And I sat next to her bed with laptop on bedside table.

A few seconds in, she weakly smiles and looks up at me.
I am looking at the screen and narrating.

A few seconds later, I look back at her.

She has gracefully left her tortured body and returned to her God.

Peace has returned to her soul.

I weep loudly into her ear, cradling her head gently…
"Baby, I am sorry to cry so… you must go and be free.
I cry because I love you so much and will miss you terribly.
But I understand, Baby."

I kiss her cold lips and caress her cool cheeks.
"Sweet dreams, Honey-Pie… till we meet again."

I pray over her still body,
"Lord, you have gotten a good one… one of the best.
I do know that she is now getting the best care possible,
And has finally found relief from her mortal imprisonment."

Deep down inside me, beyond the agony of despair,
I know that she is better off,
And so is the world she knew,
For everyone she touched was enriched.

As my Traveling Companion, we took our one last trip together;
Not one we wanted to take, nor at a time of our choosing,
But a journey we had to make, as the loving partners we were
To the very end…

Some day I will understand better
How truly wonderful the ending was for us both.

Bill Galvin 2-14-2015

Sunday, February 15, 2015
Topic(s) of this poem: dying
Lyn Paul 22 April 2015

I see your title Bill and wonder how you are coping. Your stories of you and Deb together really do show an incredible love story even though Deb was suffering. You to were suffering and still are. Your writing is so beautiful, incredibly moving. Thank you

1 0 Reply
Bill Galvin 27 April 2015

Thanks Lyn, I'm in CA with Deb's loving sister and her husband. As you know, I've created many spiritual reunions, and documented them. It does help me; though I find that when I reread my older material, like this one, the pain is still raw. Sleep is better. I trek the outdoors a lot, which was always our way of decompressing and recharging. I will probably always be writing something or another about our life together. She was an impressive woman to know; so unassuming, yet so courageous. Thank you for reading, and for your concern.

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Savita Tyagi 15 February 2015

I do not know if it is a truth of your life or just a poem of imagination, but I got lost in it. acceptance is our last recourse. Prayer strengthens it for us. Thank you for sharing.

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