Feelings Left Over From My Abuser Poem by mona martinez

feelings of anger and frustration,
kicks in out of nowhere,
it everything i felt,
when i was younger,
i knew what was coming,
and i didn't like it,
he only wanted me,
on his time and other than that,
i meant nothing to him,
pushed away like i didn't matter,
and like it was cuz of my mood,
maybe it was,
he didn't like that i sounded,
like my mother and told him the truth,
realize some just can't handle the truth,
it shine light on all of their lies,
they tell so many lies,
even they forget what is the truth,
they are driven by nothing but lies,
just to make what they doing ok,
it wrong on so many levels,
but all they care about is themselves,
abusers don't ever care what they do to you,
they care more about getting caught,
and the truth coming out,
more than the problems you are stuck with,
when you are an adult,
and all of your unhealthy coping ways,
stop working and you kind of left,
to talk it out with ppl,
than inflick the pain onto your body,
you start to learn after a few years,
that you are not to blame,
and your body is not what you hate,
you hate your abuser for,
feeling like a sex object,
you feel like how you work your body,
is the only way you get into a guys mind,
it not the only way,
but yet it one of the ways that is most easy,
when you too lazy to work through the hard way,
it what i was taught and what is hard to change,
when guys play the same mind game,
to get what they want,
it's one of those things,
control before you get controled.