Grandma Got Aids From A Reindeer Poem by Ramona Thompson

Warning the following may offend some people!

Not for all readers!

Grandma got aids from a reindeer
Walking home from our house one Christmas Eve
You can say there's no way that you can get aids that way
But as for me and grandma's lawyers we believe


When they found her Christmas morning
At the scene of the attack,
There were hoof prints on her private parts
And a not so tasty incriminating candy cane up her....
Well you know


Grandma got aids from a reindeer
Walking home from our house one Christmas Eve
You can say there's no way that you can get aids that way
But as for me and grandma's lawyers we believe


Now we're all so pissed at grandpa
Cos he's not taking it so very well
Done packed up his stuff and left grandma
Claiming she must have done something to lead that crazy reindeer on


It's just not right to have Christmas this way
All the family dressed in black afraid to touch grandma
Lest we catch what she done got
And we can't help but wonder
Should we ask now or later for her to put in her will?


Grandma got aids from a reindeer
Walking home from our house one Christmas Eve
You can say there's no way that you can get aids that way
But as for me and grandma's lawyers we believe


Now everybody here knows grandma's goose has done been cooked
So her stuff we've started to divide up
Only crying a little here and there
As grandma wonders aloud
Why did this happen to her and just who should she sue?
Santa or that crazy over horny reindeer?


I've warned all my family and friends
Better watch out for yourselfs
Cos there's a sex crazed diseased reindeer out there
And he don't believe in using a condom
When he goes up your rear


Grandma got aids from a reindeer
Walking home from our house one Christmas Eve
You can say there's no way that you can get aids that way
But as for me and grandma's lawyers we believe


Oh
As for me and grandma's lawyers we believe
Oh yes indeed we do believe.....


It's all that damn Santa Claus's fault!


2007 Ramona Thompson