Human Body Excretions Buffet …. [yes: What It Says! ; Personal; Medium Length; Touch Of Humor; Serious! ] Poem by Bri Edwards

The following account is N O T a suggested diet,
and I'm N O T suggesting anyone else should try it.
I still eat veggies, fruit, grains, fish, and meat,
but some less-common snacks I've had to eat.

Yes, body excretions, over the years, I have tried.
If I said I hadn't, then I would have lied.
And I'm N O T talking about nails of fingers or of toes, or scabs, pus, or pimple juice, or results of other woes …..
except blood.

Yes, blood I've ‘eaten', though only a small amount.
I've never eaten a whole meal of blood as has Count ……
Dracula!
And, to clarify, I H A V E eaten bits of scabs and nails,
but this poem ain't about those, and I'm not talking of pails …..of anything.

[and I don't eat "toe jam" ……………ever! ]

There is O N E body excretion I'm not sure I've eaten.
I'm talking of tears which may fall from one's eyes when one is beaten.
First of all, my life's output of tears has been extremely small,
and the few times I've had a few tears, I ate none, as I recall.

B U T, I've at least tasted excretions from five of my body parts,
including once from the part from which comes …my farts.
Oh, it's not so gross as you may suppose; it came from …..inside M E!
So, next time you're hungry, try some ….with a warm cup ….of pee.

(recipes by request)
[Don't throw up; I won't eat it! ]

(October 6, 2015)