[[ my note added on March...22nd...2018 ]]:i have a sequel poem, My Inglish Sucks - 2.
It may be found using this link on PH:
/poem/my-inglish-sucks-2-english-skills-humor-beware-the-words-short-requested-sequel/
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[ my original 2014 notes ]:
WARNING! ! ! ! ! THERE ARE A LOT OF 'ENGLISH (including spelling) MISTAKES' IN MY POEM.
i was challenged by my PH friend Kanav Justa (whose 'english' i sometimes 'correct') to write a poem entitled 'My English Sucks'.he also said something about using incorrect grammar.WELL, WHAT IS GRAMMAR? ?i read the following Wikipedia article fromand still don't know if i understand what grammar is in its totality.[how's THAT for a word: 'totality'! ? ]
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GRAMMMAR:
'The term grammar is often used by non-linguists with a very broad meaning. As Jeremy Butterfield puts it, 'Grammar is often a generic way of referring to any aspect of English that people object to.'[1] However, linguists use it in a much more specific sense. Speakers of a language have a set of internalised rules[2] for using that language. This is a grammar, and the vast majority of the information in it is acquired—at least in the case of one's native language—not by conscious study or instruction, but by observing other speakers; much of this work is done during infancy. Learning a language later in life usually involves a greater degree of explicit instruction.[3]
The term 'grammar' can also be used to describe the rules that govern the linguistic behaviour of a group of speakers. The term 'English grammar, ' therefore, may have several meanings. It may refer to the whole of English grammar—that is, to the grammars of all the speakers of the language—in which case, the term encompasses a great deal of variation.[4] Alternatively, it may refer only to what is common to the grammars of all, or of the vast majority of English speakers (such as subject-verb-object word order in simple declarative sentences) . Or it may refer to the rules of a particular, relatively well-defined variety of English (such as Standard English) .'
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SO SOME OF MY WRITING MAY BE POOR GRAMMAR.I KNOW SOME OF IT IS POOR SPELLING.I HAVE NOT CAPITALIZED THE WORD 'english'.i have left out some apostrophes. generally i have paid attention to the rules of capitalization and punctuation as i know them.SORRY KANAV if this poem is not 'sucky' enough.
THERE ARE SO MANY 'MISTAKES' that i won't bother to point all of them out now.if i receive a request from a reader who leaves a decent (meaning more than ten words) comment i may go to the trouble to spell out all of my errors.
i will point out just a few things which i mean to be 'poor english'.
1the use of 'done' as in 'a day done come'.usually i would write 'a day came'.
2some use of 'were' as in 'my best were enough'.usually i would write 'my best was enough/good enough'.
3i want to point out more, but i 'have to' move on........
bri:)
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Bri Edwards
Bri Edwards
(some time ago / Earth, i believe)
Poems by Bri Edwards : 243 / 408
My English Sucks …..[english ('poor') : Almost Medium Length; Education And Life; Ph- Inspired]
Poem by Bri Edwards
When I were schooled english wernt my thing.
My scores in English lurning no bells done ring.
Yea I grajaded but ain't english smart ….no lie!
Come end a school year the teach said 'By Bri.'
Was same in bilogy, math, jografy all that stuff.
I done did my best and guess my best were enough.
I did done grate at ball games and in trak run the mile.
I was a THREEletter man and made them girls smile.
I got payed for pumpin gas an turned 18 served my Nation.
For 'Bravry Under Fire' in the NAM I were town sensation.
Back home, all tired, I done gone back to the gas station …..
and worked evry week I culd with no vacasion.
One thing lurned what done good for me was fixin cars.
I worked with shirt of to show of my many NAM scars.
A day done come I met a girl from my dreams.
We got now three kids and life is good it seams.
I think my English done even proved a litle bit ….
but if it don't I don't' mind cuz I is happy an don't give no shit.
(August 29,2014)
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Please read my 2018 addition to my Poet's Notes. There is a sequel to the poem you just read. :) bri
Topic(s) of this poem: humorous, life, family life
Poems by Bri Edwards : 243 / 408
Poet's Notes about The Poem
Comments about My English Sucks …..[english ('poor') : Almost Medium Length; Education And Life; Ph- Inspired] by Bri Edwards
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Poem Submitted: Friday, August 29, 2014
Poem Edited: Thursday, March 22, 2018
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I thought this was a very nice piece of poetry..(Report)Reply
A day done come I met a girl from my dreams.
We got now three kids and life is good it seams.....beautiful(Report)Reply
This poem is hilarious! I love it!(Report)Reply
I re-read this one and realized that YOUR English doesn't suck as bad as most of the " poets" on this site. (Report) ,
I agree with this. But it occurs to me that writing the English that sucks, must be more strenuous than writing the normal one that does not.
Good fun.(Report)Reply
Oh And thanks for pulling our leg no english indeed. Cheers(Report)Reply
Well what can I say english or no english d images are dere n dey tel a story. Keep writin is great(Report)Reply
A " prudent tactic" I'd say, for this debilitates me from pointing out the " true mistakes" . This poem made me smile (and laugh in numerous instances) . Thank you for this light (if I can say so) poem.(Report)Reply
A humorous interpretation, at least in my opinion, of the trammels faced by an aspiring linguist. A paragon, in a word, for all the simulacra of the onerous hindrances and obstructions I was involuntarily acquainted with. Reading this takes me to the time of the budding me, pursuing mastery of English out of pure linguistic fervour.(Report)Reply
I re-read this one and realized that YOUR English doesn't suck as bad as most of the " poets" on this site.(Report)Reply
This sounds a lot like a passage from Huckleberry Finn.(Report)Reply
" an don't give no." I was under the impression that profanity is not allowed. If it is, then I will amend my poem " I Love Poetry."(Report)Reply
Loved the poem! Humour and wisdom together!(Report)Reply
Fantastic poem.. very beautiful...with nice diction... thanks(Report)Reply
Nice poem, fell in loved with it. You really talked about the way education is and it advantages.
I really enjoyed it.(Report)Reply
I read your poem again. I am convinced -it is excellent.you served your nation; you pumped gas; you are proud of it. I appreciate your sincerity. Who cares for grammar and spelling-they are not important in life.The poem itself is very enjoyable. regards(Report)Reply
A day done come I met a girl from my dreams.
I guess it was your best day(Report)Reply
A clever and humourous piece of writing, I enjoyed it Bri!(Report)Reply
Doesn't matter - your poems conveys the sense - by Bri! - and funnily enough. Congrats for a lovely poem!(Report)Reply
Error: Please read as: I have been reading..(Report)Reply
I am reading this piece of work time and again. However, I have not yet been able to count number of mistakes. I gave this passage to my students to do it for me (to count number of mistakes) but varied opinion came from my students.....some said, it is '9'...some said '12' and some dull students replied, 'Sir, there is no mistake in this passage'. Please tell me how many mistakes you have put deliberately! This is only known to you! Please answer through the reply option.....Dillip(Report)Reply
Bri's answer: ABOUT 46 'MISTAKES':
STANZA 1: ELEVEN (11) : were; english; wernt; lurning; done; Yea; grajaded; english; a; teach; By
STANZA 2: TEN (10) : Was; bilogy; jografy; done did; were; did done; grate; trak; run; them;
STANZA 3: NINE (9) : payed; pumpin; an; Bravry; were; done gone; evry; culd; vacasion
STANZA 4: EIGHT (8) : lurned; what done; fixin; of; of; done come; got; seams;
STANZA 5: EIGHT (8) : done even; proved; little; don’t’; cuz; is; an; give no+