There I am on his chest
wishing he's the very best,
Sighing for relief
kissing him on the cheek,
hand on our hearts,
Never wanting to be apart,
And so I'm crying on his sholder
wishing we were older!
what there is of ths works really well, Brittany! but there's not yet ough to sustain the poem - aim to develop with 2 more stanzas using the same rhythm - or variations from it. I think y've got an excellent ear for syllabic poetry - and i also like the way y're able to combine a concern with crafting with powerful emotions. DIM
Ah, not to be apart is a very deep wish alot want.: (Unfortuantly it doesn't always come true.
Very nice poem. Keep writing for I can see you got the heart and mind to write beautiful poetry. thanks and best wishes, melvin
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
i love them all and i love you