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! Pooh Bear And The Alarming Rumour

Rating: 2.1

In the Hundred Acre Wood, agitation spread like one of those cold March winds that seem to be blowing in every direction at once. All the Animals were murmuring to each other, then to someone else, and rumour spread like blown dry leaves in an autumn gale..

Wol’s nephew, who was too clever for his own good, Wol said, had found a torn piece of dirty newspaper wrapped round some compost behind a tree, which came, it said, ‘From Our …..wood Correspondent’
and which said something about ‘…Robin…girl’…

What could it mean? Had CR found a girlfriend? Pooh was half happy for him, but the other half knew that girls meant boys having less time for walks in the wood with bears, however Much Loved…

Others feared that CR would be going away to school, as he had told them he would one day, and his sister – who they’d never met – would come instead and do girly things like tidy up, and brush Eeyore’s hair away from his eyes, and sit the Animals in a row and play School … Piglet turned very pink around the ears at the thought.

Rabbit’s friends and relations were unconcerned – they had bunny girls of their own to play with. But Roo got the story wrong as usual, and thought CR would change into a girl, like hens sometimes change into cocks, and got all excited and jumped up and down shouting ‘Christine Robinia…’ which embarrassed everyone. While Tigger just bounced around, hoping that this would be a New Adventure after all..

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Michael Shepherd 26 December 2005

You have to know that Pooh Bear's sellout Disney makeover, with that dumbum mouth, is regarded by Brits as on a par with the Bush administration... and now they're planning to change CR to a girl...

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