Size Does Matter Poem by Herbert Nehrlich

Two men, named Engelbert and Rolf
were playing early morning golf.
To keep their mind and skills awake
they soon decided on a break.

Two coffin nails would taste just right
now all they needed was a light.
Big Engelbert said that his BIC,
twelve inch in length, would do the trick.

'Good God, where did you find this meanie? '
'It was a present from my Genie.'
'Well, where, if I may be so bold
can I, your buddie, get ahold
of such a wondrous, precious ghost? '

'He does reside (Bert had to boast)
inside my alligator bag, '
he grunted as he lit his fag.
The genie who had overheard
the conversation, word for word,
stuck out his head and said 'you've won
your private wish, but only one.'

Said Rolf, who needed a new Tux:
'Just let me have a million bucks! '
Great darkness now came to the sky
a million mallard ducks flew by.

Rolf used his fist and grabbed the shirt
of his old buddie Engelbert.
'I said a million BUCKS, not DUCKS
this genie really, truly sucks! '

Said Engelbert, 'well I agree
just think about it, look at me.
And do you think that I would pick
in middle age a twelve inch BIC? '

Written for my special friend Gina.